I'm thinking a lot of 9/11 lately. First of all, the 10th anniversary is buzzing around everywhere. Second, the boys are old enough to have heard about the twin towers falling and wanting to know why. Third, DR's birthday is on 9/11. He turned 25 that day. Needless to say celebrating his birthday since I've known him has never been fun.
I heard Alan Jackson's Where Were You When The World Stop Turning the other day.
That song makes me cry to this day.
"Where were you when the world stop turning? Teaching a class full of innocent children."
"Did you call up your mother, tell her you loved her?"
When the towers were hit, I was in a classroom of 6th graders taking ISTEP testing. It was a Tuesday. All the tv's were off. My next door teacher tiptoed in and told me the news after his wife had called him. I thought he was joking. Because we were in testing I couldn't turn on the tv or even talk about it for over an hour. I remember exactly what I was wearing that day; a khaki skirt and a denim 3/4 sleeve shirt over a red sleeveless sweater. I remember leaning against a counter in a daze watching over the heads of these innocent kids who, at the moment, had no idea what was going on.
Later, of course, when classes resumed (6th, 7th and 8th graders) all the teachers had their tv's on and nothing was getting done that day. By noon though, my building principal had told all teachers to turn off the tvs which simply infuriated all of the history teachers. Rightly so. She, our principal, insisted that the tragedy was something the kids could talk to their parents about when they got home.
I was so mad. I was at whoever hit the towers and planes, because at the time no one knew, and I simply couldn't believe that our principal was going to let these kids go into an emotional overload during the afternoon without having any facts before they got home, instead rumors ran rampant through the afternoon about "who done it". Life would have been much simpler that afternoon if we had all watched tv.
I watched a bit of tv during my lunch hour and that made me a wreck for the rest of the afternoon.
Finally school was over and I made it home and turned on tv. I could barely believe the footage I was seeing. I cried and cried. I called my mom, of course, who was two hours away from me. She said, "Well now that you've called I've heard from all my kids." I remember ranting and crying to my mom over the phone. "How could anyone do such a thing?", I cried over and over and over. It just didn't make sense....it still doesn't. She just let me talk to her and we prayed together.
Looking back now, I wonder how was my mom feeling? Was she torn and crying inside or out? I never asked. I just called her immediately knowing she'd comfort me in any way she could. Mom was the only person I even imagined calling that day. Moms gain great courage and strength when their kids are in trouble don't they? Even emotional trouble. At the time I was an emotional wreck but if the same kind of event happened today I could totally see myself bucking back the tears and anger to watch over my kids.
I don't know what we are going to do on 9/11 this year. If the boys want to talk about it we will. I'm not going to watch the news though. I saw enough of it 10 years ago. We probably won't celebrate DR's 35th birthday either. It's harvest so he'll probably be working.
Where were you on 9/11/2001? What are your plans for 9/11/2011?
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