When I was pregnant with my twin boys I often envisioned that they would grow up and have a really close relationship. I always thought how wonderful it would be if they were each other's best friends, lovingly shared everything and really enjoyed spending all their time together....basically attached at the hip. The closest I came to that as reality was when they were babies asleep in the same crib. This little fantasy of mine busted long ago...and it continues to be out of reach to this day.
Yip came home from school the other day, kind of down in the dumps, and said, "I wish Yap had been born a different year than me." He wished he wasn't a twin, poor guy. He's spent 8 1/2 years sharing toys, clothes, a bedroom...everything, with his brother. Yip and Yap have probably had to share more stuff than DR and I have since we've been married. Our school is so small that there is only one teacher per grade so Yip and Yap have had to share a teacher and classmates for the last three years.
I had six brothers and sisters and I know from first hand experience that siblings are annoying but I'm getting the feeling that a twin sibling must be a whole new level of aggravating. Yip and Yap seem to really know how to push each other's buttons and tend to test those buttons on a regular basis.
There's a lot about the lives of my twin boys that I just can't change. We don't have an extra bedroom so they don't have to share one. I can't get them separate teachers. I would be happy to divide and label all their clothes so they wouldn't have to share those but...they're boys, I don't think they care one bit whether they have to share clothes or not. (I would venture to guess that would be totally different with twin girls though.)
DR and I have made a lot of efforts to encourage their differences though. Yip is into duct tape and cardboard, Yap has his Legos and I'm not going to make either share with the other. Yip likes t-shirts, Yap prefers hoodie sweatshirts. Fine, I promise to never ask you to wear identical clothes.
The funny thing is though despite the fact that Yip and Yap can be one another's mortal enemy there are also times they are one another's biggest ally. For example; a new Lego set was just released (something to do with crocodiles, lions and boats....I'm sure I'm oversimplifying it but that's the gist I got from them) and DR and I won't buy it for them, it's something like $70! However, Yip and Yap have decided to pool all their money and buy it together. This isn't some spur of the moment thing. They've been talking daily about it for 2 weeks; counting their money and looking for new jobs to get paid for.
It seems like being a twin you don't have to just deal with the normal sibling aggravations, rather they are pushed to the extreme. There are extreme negatives but extreme positives too. So what's worse the extremes of twins or the drama of girls? (I'll let you know once I've survived Yahoo's teen years. Her three year old drama is a whole other subject that easily rivals twin extremes!)
Any suggestions? Tips? Great twin stories to share? How can I make the life of my twins, who sometimes don't want to be twins, just a little bit easier?
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I'd love to hear what you have to say! I try to reply to every one of them.